Emotions Are Just Data
Lessons from a new keynote I delivered this week
This week, I had the chance to speak at an event for the Project Management Institute Northeast Wisconsin Chapter (shout out to any new PMI-NEW members on the newsletter), where I gave a keynote on an unlikely topic: emotional intelligence.
That’s right, I, a self-proclaimed engineer who considers emotions to just be data, willingly spoke about feelings. I’m sure Pretzel (my wife) would love if I did that more at home and not just on stage…
But the talk was my take on a logical approach to emotional intelligence. While it might sound like therapy with a Gantt chart, it was really about something simple and powerful:
Emotions are the real driver of connection, productivity, and satisfaction at work.
And yet, most of us were trained in task completion, not trust-building. So this session aimed to fix that, with practical tools, a few laughs, and only two-groan worthy jokes.
What I didn’t mention to the audience that day: it was my first time delivering that presentation in front of a live audience. Luckily it seemed to resonate:
If you also want some perspectives that can be used at work and life, here are some of the the top takeaways from the session.
1. Emotions Are Data (So EQ is Data Analytics)
You don’t have to be a “feelings person” to get value from emotions. Just treat them like inputs:
Anger? That’s data about a boundary being crossed.
Stress? It’s a signal that your capacity doesn’t match your current load.
Joy? That’s your internal dashboard saying, “Do more of this.”
When you’re feeling an intense emotion, take a step back and ask, “what is this feeling telling me.” Then you can start to chart a course of action. Oh, and if the emotion you most feel is boredom, find your own ways to choose fun.
2. Relationships Don’t Just Happen, They’re Built (Strategically)
The best project managers (and leaders) find ways to influence far beyond their job title. You have to, especially when working across teams, departments, or time zones. That means trust isn’t optional, it’s necessary to get results.
If you want people to open up, collaborate, or meet a deadline without passive-aggressive emails, here are three fast ways to get there:
Shared Respect - Remember, you're working with humans (and sometimes ChatGPT). Respect precedes results.
Shared Identity - When we recognize ways we are like someone, we start to like them more. Create connection by finding common interests, opinions, and values.
Shared Experiences – We become closer together through shared experiences, whether positive or negative. We already have plenty of negative experiences at work, so why not create some positive ones with a bit of intentional humor in the workplace.
3. Use ASK Conversations to Build (or Rebuild) Any Relationship
If you’re like me and struggle through “small talk” conversations with people, remember this framework:
A – Ask interesting questions
S – Share compelling stories
K – Keep it going with Yes And
This method works whether you’re onboarding a new team member or rebuilding trust with someone who still hasn’t forgiven you for the sprint planning meeting that went 93 minutes.
If you were at the event, thanks for showing up, leaning in, and laughing along. If you weren’t, I hope these takeaways give you something useful (or at least mildly amusing) for your next project kickoff.
Project management (and most work in general) isn’t just about tasks—it’s about people.
And yes, people are weird. They’re inefficient, irrational, inconsistent—and also creative, collaborative, and occasionally hilarious. The more we learn to read and respond to their emotional data, the smarter (and more enjoyable) our work becomes.
(an)drew
PS. Interested in bringing our talk on EQ to your team or organization? Just hit reply and let’s chat.